The cynical crayon

I'm Cynical,mostly facetious,always bespectacled & hilarious. This where I chronicle the trials and tribulations of life as a stay at home mom.

OK lets not oversell, my friends think that I'm funny; Is that like having your mom say you're pretty?

Questions? drop me a line: or follow me on Twitter @cynicalcrayon
Posts tagged "motherhood"
In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage.

- Bill Cosby, Fatherhood

Day two of rain….This is going to be a looong day.

Day two of rain….This is going to be a looong day.

Barbie shoes, the bane of my existence.

Via Instagram

Mother’s day gifts from my little ones. Also not pictured gift certificates to the spa! 

This is the inscription on the back of the hand prints:

Sometimes you get discouraged; Because I am so small.

And always leave my fingerprints on furniture and walls.

But every day I’m growing - I’ll be grown some day

And all those tiny hand-prints Will surely fade away.

So here’s a little hand-print Just so you can recall

Exactly how my fingers looked When I was very small.

Via Instagram

Would you apply for a job that has these requirements:

• Standing up almost all the time

• Constantly exerting yourself

• Working from 135 to unlimited hours per week

• Degrees in medicine, finance and culinary arts necessary

• No vacations

• The work load goes up on Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s and other holidays

• No time to sleep

• Salary = $0

Probably not, but many people already have the job. Watch this until the end to find out the other name for the Director of Operations. I promise it’s worth it!

GPOY: When my kids are fighting about something trivial. 

GPOY: When my kids are fighting about something trivial. 

“A daughter is a mother’s gender partner, her closest ally in the family confederacy, an extension of her self. And mothers are their daughters’ role model, their biological and emotional road map, the arbiter of all their relationships.” ― Victoria Secunda

Mothers & Daughters via Instagram

R.I.P old friend…

R.I.P old friend…

Thank God for my loving husband, who has been taking care of us this holiday season. With two sick kids and a sick wife, he has been our rock.

He is literally the last man standing in this house filled with sickies. 

If that weren’t enough he has been running all the errands and doing the last minute Christmas shopping. My wonderful husband took care of the kids this morning and let me sleep in, until 11am !!!

I love you so much and thanks again.


The only thing worse than fighting traffic to get my kids to swimming lessons, is getting there late. Only to discover a dearth of parking, when I finally managed to find a spot it was almost at the end of the lot.

We get out of the car and run to the building, only to have my son blow chunks in the locker room. If motherhood is some type of a test, this morning definitely requires a retake.